The Paw in The Drawer Club

by Boo Brignell, Ace Reporter

The brainchild of Oliver-Robert Bear, The Paw in The Drawer Club held its meetings in the Rat Planet desk drawer. All of the pens, pencils and paper clips had been removed for safe keeping and replaced with soft paper bedding. It was originally just a meeting place but, due to its growing popularity, soon became a supper club and sleepover society admitting members only. Any gatecrashers were swiftly and severely dealt with.

Membership was dependent on the number of Oliver-Robert’s biscuits and nuts (No. Not those nuts. He had those snipped when he was young) a young rat could steal and stash successfully. No more than three members at a time were allowed into the drawer itself, although a list of waiting members could be proposed.

In it’s heyday, the Paw in The Drawer Club was where it all happened. Every rat in the house yearned to be allowed into its warm and smelly confines. The main radiator hummed behind the drawer and kept it warm throughout the winter months. During the summer it was cool and dark, allowing for a comfortable snooze during the long sunny days. Beds were changed regularly although such a small, confined space always turned smelly rather quickly.

As the number of members grew, along with Oliver-Robert’s waistline, the club drawer had to be fortified with duct tape. The interior of the drawer had a vinyl lining, which could easily be removed for cleaning. The vinyl was replaced regularly as the styles were updated. The current lining is red and white gingham, which is a great favorite with all of the members.

The management of The Paw in The Drawer Club (Heather - human!) stated that meals would not be served in the drawer itself, but on the shelf below the drawer. The shelf, just like the drawer, had been cleared of anything office-like and replaced with step boxes and a vinyl floor. No one really seemed to mind this, as there were always plenty of dog biscuits and hazelnuts inside the drawer. These were supplied, free of charge, by the management.

Access to The Paw in The Drawer Club was only via the shelf and step boxes into the back of the drawer. The larger rats sometimes found it a little difficult, especially if they were carrying large Bonio dog biscuits in their mouth. These were very sought after and any rat carrying one was automatically admitted to the drawer. This wasn’t to say that they automatically became a member. They would still have to undertake the initiation stealing and stashing.

Ah, those heady days. The Paw in The Drawer Club ran for some time and leadership was passed on from rat to rat. I often longed to join them in the drawer … until I opened it and smelled the air!